Just Love Me When You Can
by beyond-the-twilight
Summary: Prompts I've filled for the Puck/Rachel drabble meme at livejournal. Genres vary but always feature Puckleberry friendship/relationship. Rated T for Puck's mouth.
1. Angst from the L Word

**A/N: I do not own Glee. **

**Prompt – ****Shane ****Puck: You know, my entire life people have said that I would become a psychopath if I didn't learn how to feel. And I wanna, know, ****Cherie ****Rach, what the fuck is so great about feeling? Because I finally let myself, and I feel like my heart's been completely ripped out. **

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><p>This… this is why Glee sucks. He was perfectly happy throwing slushies in people's faces and sleeping with cougars and not giving a damn what people thought. Then Glee came along, with Rachel freaking Berry, and suddenly, everything was different.<p>

He actually cared.

She may not know it but it's her fault. She's the reason he started caring. She was the person that made him stop with the slushies and reduce the amount of people he slept with and she was the only person he felt like making an effort for.

Hell, he got into NYU for her. He was planning on following her to New York and she may have pretended that it wasn't for her but that was a lie. Every single person in Glee club knew that he only applied to NYU so that he could follow her and hopefully be with her when she finally got over Finn.

She knew the score. She was supposed to leave Finn in Lima and fly to New York with him and they were supposed to work crappy jobs just so that they could buy food, and it wasn't going to be perfect but it was going to be theirs. He may not have said the words out loud but she knew that he cared. She knew that he was going to New York to be with her – to finally get his chance at being her leading man.

She knew that, which is why it hurts so much more when she approaches him after Glee rehearsal and pulls him aside.

"Noah… I'm really sorry but I'm not going to New York anymore", she says softly, her eyes avoiding his. He's not afraid to admit that his heart sunk in his chest and the room seems to be spinning. This isn't the way things were supposed to go.

"What are you talking about crazy?" he teases, attempting to snap her out of it.

"Finn and I have been talking and we decided it would be best for our relationship if I stayed in Lima and did my degree here before moving to New York and conquering Broadway"

"But you got into Julliard, Rach. That's a million times better than OSU", he reminds her, his hands clenching into fists.

"Yes, but OSU doesn't have Finn", she says quietly, her eyes firmly focused on the floor.

"What the hell Rachel? You're sacrificing New York for Finn? For god's sake, when are you going to realize that you deserve better than Finn Hudson? I got myself accepted to NYU so that I could have a chance to be with you and you're throwing everything away to be with a guy who'll eventually get bored of you and run back to Quinn"

"Noah, I didn't know…" she pleads, her eyes begging him to understand. "I didn't know that's why you wanted to go to NYU, I promise, but I have to see this relationship through. I've wanted Finn for years and now that he wants me, I don't want to throw it away"

"Cut the crap Rachel. You and I both know you're lying. Every single person in Glee knows that I'm going to New York to be with you, so don't try and deny it. And just so you know, if you stay here in Lima with Hudson, you're never going to get out. He'll never let you go. The only reason he's fighting for you so hard now is 'cos he knows that if you go to New York, you're going to realize you deserve better than him"

"I'm sorry Noah but I'm with Finn and that's the way it's going to stay" she whispers, her eyes filling with tears.

"You know, my entire life people have said that I would become a psychopath if I didn't learn how to feel. And I wanna know, Rach, what the fuck is so great about feeling? Because I finally let myself, and I feel like my heart's been completely ripped out"

"Noah…"

"No, I get it. Finn's the goddamn golden boy and I'm the Lima loser that'll never amount to anything", he growls, his voice breaking with emotion. "I just wish you could see past that because I'm so much better for you than Finn could ever be"

"Noah…"

He just smiles softly at her, his heart aching in his chest, as he turns on his heel and walks away from the woman he loves, hoping more than anything that she'll choose to follow him to New York, even if she doesn't want to be with him because she deserves so much more than Finn Hudson and Lima, Ohio.


	2. TextPicture Prompt

**A/N: Written for a text/picture prompt: Hey you, yeah you. You with the messy hair, the seemingly tired eyes, the crooked smile, and the one who thinks they're unimportant. You're beautiful and I love you. **

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><p>She sees that he's struggling after giving up Beth and she's probably one of the only people who has any idea how much he's hurting, so they strike up a tentative friendship.<p>

What she doesn't expect is to fall in love with him.

He's just – surprisingly – perfect. He may say that he's not the best with words but he always knows exactly what to say to make her feel better. He's funny and kind and protective – the best friend she's always wanted but never been able to find. Then there's the way he looks, like a model pulled straight from a magazine, and the way that even one touch from him makes her heart start racing.

To summarize, she's head over heels in love with Noah Puckerman.  
>The only thing she hates about him is that he won't make a move. She knows that he likes her. He told Matt, who told Santana, who told Brittany, who then told her after a Glee rehearsal. He's liked her for a while too, and according to Brittany, it's not just a passing fancy. He wants her, and for more than just a once off roll in the sheets. He actually likes her crazy and wants to be in an honest to god relationship with her.<p>

He just won't man up and admit it.

She tries dropping hints. She flirts to the best of her ability and invites him to the movies and her house and the park as often as she can. He drives her to school and to dance lessons and she spends at least one night a week at his house, eating dinner with his mum and sister. It's like they're dating but without any of the benefits or commitment, and it's driving her insane.

It all comes to a head at Glee practice which is where everything of importance occurs. Finn, who hasn't quite understood the fact that she's moved on from him, sings some soppy song and asks her if they can give them a real shot. She's speechless – and not in a good way – when Noah stands up and storms out of the room, his hands clenched into fists.

She doesn't bother giving Finn a response, choosing to run out of the room and chase Noah down the corridor. She yells his name again and again but he ignores her.

"Hey you", she screams, stopping dead in the hallway, her voice so loud it forces him to turn around. "Yeah, you", she adds when he frowns at her. "You with the messy hair, the seemingly tired eyes, the crooked smile, and the one who thinks they're unimportant", she whispers, her chest heaving. "You're beautiful and I love you"

He just stares at her, his eyes wide.

"I don't want to be with Finn or anyone else. I just want to be with you", she says softly, her eyes meeting his.

"About time you admitted it", he teases, his eyes sparkling as he closes the space between them and presses his lips against hers. "You're my girl from now on Rach"


	3. Magazine Article

**A/N: Written for the prompt – Rachel reads a magazine article – something like how to tell if a guy's into you, etc. – to see if Finn/whoever likes her. All the things the magazine lists are things she then realizes that Puck does. **

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><p>She's flicking through Cosmo when the article catches her eye, the bold heading quickly capturing her interest. How to tell if a guy's into you, it proclaims, and as she scans down the page, she notices that it's broken into seven simple steps. Realizing she has nothing better to do as her MySpace video won't be finished uploading for another twenty minutes, she settles in her desk chair, intent on seeing if Finn is showing signs that he wants them to get back together.<p>

He'll choose you over things that are important to him, step one reads, and she frowns a little. Finn's never chosen her over anything that was important to him. He chose football over Glee even though his pregnant girlfriend was in the club and when they were dating, he told her that she shouldn't ask him to choose between her and football.

Shaking off her doubt, she moves down to the next step. He'll stand up for you and defend you. Smiling a little, she remembers the time that Finn stood up for when Santana was being horrible… actually, no, that was Noah, but there was that time when… no, that was Noah too… her frown deepens as she struggles to remember a time when Finn defended her.

He won't be ashamed to admit that he's with you/into you in front of his friends, the next step informs her. "This is rubbish", she says out loud. "These steps are complete and utter rubbish!" she adds as she remembers the times when Finn chose his popularity over her because being with her would be too embarrassing for him.

She can't stop her eyes from skimming down the page though.

He'll do those little things you ask him to do even though he doesn't want to do them, the next step reads. She tries to remember the last time Finn did something she asked of him. He did sing all of those duets with her, but that wasn't because she asked him but because it was expected of them due to their status as a couple. In fact, most of the time it's her doing favours for him instead of the other way around.

He'll love the parts of you that even you don't love. "Aha", she declares triumphantly, finally finding a point that suggests that Finn's interested in her. After all, he said that she was beautiful when she was considering getting a nose job, hinting that he loved her nose even if she didn't like it. She tries to ignore the little voice in the back of her head reminding her of all the things that Finn didn't love about her.

He'll always make you feel like you are the most important person in his life. Her heart sinks as she realizes that Finn has never made her feel like she was the most important person in his life. She always felt second best, the consolation prize when compared to Quinn or even to Santana. In fact, the only person that's ever made her feel important is Noah.

He'll text you throughout the day even if he has nothing important to say just because he misses you. She reaches for her phone, her fingers quickly opening up her inbox, fully expecting to see countless messages from Finn. Instead, she finds message after message from Noah, all filled with meaningless little anecdotes. Some of the messages were sent just a couple of hours after he last saw her, whereas the only message in her inbox from Finn is a question about Glee.

He'll be your best friend as well as your potential boyfriend. The first name that pops into her mind is Noah, who is, without a doubt, her best friend. He's the one person she tells everything to, and not even Kurt is that close to her.

She looks back over the questions, her heart sinking as she realizes that Finn truly isn't that into her. Her sadness is quickly erased when her phone vibrates in her hand, a text message from Noah flashing on the screen. She opens it quickly, smiling when she sees the goodnight message.

None of these points may have pointed to Finn being into her but she's fairly sure that Noah is more than a little interested. Her smile widening, she quickly texts him back, asking if he'd like to watch a movie together this weekend.

Finn may not be her perfect guy but she's more than ready to find out if Noah fits the profile.


	4. Heavy Angst

**A/N: Written for the prompt - **_**Fuck you for giving up on me**_

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><p>They've been broken up for two weeks now and he knows that getting drunk and going to Rachel's apartment is the worst idea he's ever had. He can't stay away though.<p>

It's 3am when he knocks on the door, probably a little louder than necessary, and when she opens it, looking hot as hell in her tiny nightgown, he has to restrain himself from pushing her up against the wall and making her sorry for ever dumping him.

"Noah?" she whispers as she wipes her eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"You don't get to call me Noah anymore", he growls as he stalks into her apartment (it used to be theirs), his heart pounding with adrenaline. "You lost that right when you broke up with me"

"Noah…" she says softly, her eyes begging him to understand. "You have to let me explain"

He ignores her, walking past her and throwing himself onto her couch (the couch that used to be theirs). He can hear her shutting the door and her footsteps padding across the floor towards where he's lying but he tunes her out.

He remembers that night two weeks ago when he came home from work and found Rachel sitting on the edge of their bed, his bags packed at her feet. She had told him that she couldn't be in this relationship any longer, that she wasn't happy and that she needed to get out before she went insane. She was feeling too stifled – trapped by a high school relationship – and she needed to be free.

"Noah, please listen to me", she says softly, her hand on his back, and he's jolted back to the present.

"I don't want to hear anything you have to say", he growls, shifting so that her hand is pushed off of his back. "I gave you everything and you threw it back in my face"

"Noah, please… listen to me", she begs, her eyes filling with tears as she stares at him. "I miss you. I made a mistake. I got scared and confused and I thought that there was something better out there. I made a mistake Noah… please, you have to forgive me. I'll do anything to make it up to you", she whimpers.

He jumps off the couch, his eyes furious as he stares at the woman he was planning on asking to marry him. She's crying on the couch and despite the fact that he wants to pull her into his arms and forgive her, he doesn't move towards her. He thought she was the one person who would never hurt him and she ended up hurting him more than anyone else in the world.

"Fuck you for giving up on me…" he hisses before turning his back and storming out of her apartment, making sure to slam the door behind him.

"Fuck you for giving up on me", he repeats as he walks down the corridor, trying to ignore the sound of her sobs drifting from her apartment. "Fuck you…"


	5. Smirk

**A/N: Written for the prompt – **

**Rachel: For Barbra's sake, Finn, what part of it's over you don't understand?  
>Finn: But... but... Why?<br>Rachel: Because you don't smirk. You grin, and you smile, but you don't smirk.**

**Because we've seen Jesse smirking, and we've seen Puck smirking, but Finn never did.**

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><p>It's a Tuesday night and she's watching over old performance videos from various New Directions performances and just random little snippets of rehearsals that Artie has collected over time when it hits her.<p>

Finn doesn't smirk.

She doesn't know why it's a big deal. Finn's supposed to be her happily ever after, the one person she spends the rest of her life with, and she doesn't know why the fact that he doesn't smirk is suddenly a problem.

She figures it out when she walks into school the next morning, bags under her eyes due to the lack of sleep the night before, and sees Noah. He's leaning against his locker and his eyes meet hers as she walks past. He winks at her and smirks and her face flushes and her heart starts to beat faster. Then she sees Finn, and he smiles that crooked half-smile at her that used to make her swoon but she feels nothing. She turns and looks back at him, and although his smirk is gone, she can't help but smile when she looks at him.

That's when the pieces fall into place. Finn doesn't smirk and that's a big deal because Noah does.

It takes her two weeks to make her decision – two weeks of making pros and cons lists examining every possible outcome of the situation – before she approaches Finn and tells him that it's over. Naturally, he protests.

"For Barbra's sake, Finn, what part of its over don't you understand?" she exclaims after ten minutes of trying to tell him that their relationship is over.

"But… but… why?" he whines as he puts on his best puppy dog expression. "We're supposed to be together until the end of this year Rachel… why are you breaking up with me now?"

"Because you don't smirk. You grin, and you smile, but you don't smirk", she informs him. "I've found myself becoming incredibly attracted to men who smirk and the bad boy attitude that accompanies it"

"What does that even mean?"

"It means that I have a date with Noah on Saturday night, and I'd appreciate it if you would try to restrain yourself from ruining it", she declares before turning on her heel and marching away, heading for the nurses office where she knows that Noah will be hiding.

She has to inform him that they're going out on Saturday night.


End file.
